Friday, December 14, 2018

Solitary Behavior: How Should You Resolve this Irrepressive Psychological Dilemma?

Loneliness whether it is chronic or mild, is a very delicate emotional issue to deal with. A solitary behavior has gravely affected almost 41% percent of American adults. Consequently, the overall being of these people had suffered dire consequences which include a weaker immune system, inflammations, cardiovascular problems and obesity among others. This negative behavior causes an inevitable threat to both health and longevity, if not immediately controlled  or preempted. Also,  loneliness is closely associated with chronic depression. In this regard, socialization  and other relations are at stake due to a perceptual distortion. This a belief that friends, his or her family care less about them. Perceptual distortion is an unseen trap for some people that could possibly lead to a sense of social isolation. Commonly, it is characterized as emotionally raw.  This is  not a healthy behavior in a sense that a person becomes hesitant to risk rejection by seeking  some advices from those people who could be  pivotal factors to decrease their loneliness to a large extent.
Solitary behavior is caused by perceptual distortion. 

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Solitary behavior is not defined through the so-called objective measures;  but by a set of subjective experiences of distress wherein one's social needs are not gratified. Therefore, this  kind of behavior can be resolved by means of  the internal sense of social relationships based on their quality and depth. The said resolution strategies are integrated with different hypothetical scenarios such as high-cost, low-cost and commitment signal failures. A high-cost signal refers to the promptness of  assistance of a friend who would cancel his or her appointments just have a heart-to-heart talk with you, to make things much better. A low-cost signal is either an email, text or other impersonal approaches to help you resolve your  biggest challenges at the moment. But, the most disgusting strategy of all is your friend's state of forgetfulness whenever you need a shoulder to cry on. 

A person's solitary behavior is resolved 
by different categorical strategies and approaches. 

IMAGE: https://i0.wp.com/www.stopsolitaryforkids.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/cropped-HEADER.jpg

This hazardous solitary behavior dilemma can be addressed by adopting these scientific techniques: 

  1. Re-evaluation of caring and commitment gestures. Do this when you are angry and learn how to dismiss it calmly by treating a negative reaction as insignificant.  Try to re-label the previous positive gestures of other people in your life. Doing so, it establishes a strong and formidable reconnection.
  2. Develop a creative reaching out approach by keeping it positive all the time. Ponder about your good times together. 
  3. Revisiting your most memorable places together. This will reignite your connection to one another and refuel your old feelings in the past.
  4. Do not hesitate to do new things together. Share experiences with each other to bring back the closeness and regenerate the feelings of excitement  just like before. 
  5. Practice the perspective taking approach. This is an essential tool  for enhancing your relationships to alleviate loneliness gradually. Improve  your sense of thoughts by taking a deep breath and absorb the perspectives of another person to become more understanding deepen  your sense of commitment and trust. 
Perspective taking approach is one unique mechanism 
to get rid of solitary behaviour.

IMAGE: http://listverse.com/2015/05/20/10-brutal-realities-of-living-in-solitary-confinement/

It takes faith, hope and courage to finally get out of a trap caused by solitary behavior. Get reconnected with your old self again. Ponder about the happiest moments of your life. Count your blessings and be thankful each day. 






Thursday, December 13, 2018

Sexual Fantasies and its Intriguing Revelations about our Personality

Sexual fantasies are normal and intriguing by-products of our imaginative mind. The truth is whatever these are, psychologists have concluded that flesh-related pleasures send cues or signals about ourselves. For instance, a normal sexual encounter tends to reveal that your partner wants to be the center of your undivided attention. Any type of this psychological  rendezvous features a tendency to gratify the uniqueness of our psychological need. This was significantly found out by an expert who had published his surprising conclusions in a controversial book entitled "Archives of Sexual Behavior", which was co-authored by Dr. David Ley and sex columnist Dan Savage. The focal point of this highly-controversial research paper was all about cuckolding fantasies which are defined as the act of entertaining an unusual thought that their partner is having sex with someone else. In the said thrilling study, the subjects were asked to describe their previous cuckolding fantasies in a narrative form. Consequently, a substantial variability was established  based the way that those scenarios  had taken its course.
Sexual fantasies are unusual mirrors of who we are.

IMAGE:https://english.newstracklive.com/news/did-you-know-these-sexual-fantasies-of-men-and-women-31302-1.html

Surprisingly, each participant had their  own unique versions of their tillating sexual fantasies. Some desired to  watch the lovemaking scenes as they unfolded before their very eyes. The other participants wanted an audible sexual pleasure by merely listening to these sensuous sounds, the  presence of unsafe sex or without any use of a condom, different sexual positions and the size of their partner's private part most especially in males. What do they have mysteriously discovered? Read on.

Your  sexual fantasies are closely linked to different personality traits.

IMAGE:http://canadajournal.net/health/men-want-weird-sexual-fantasies-come-true-new-study-18507-2014/

First and foremost, those people who scored high in the Big 5 Personality Trait Test in the agreeableness category, characterized as loving and caring, assesses  their sexual fantasies on seeing their partner receiving sexual pleasures. Furthermore, persons who got high scores  on a trait known as sexual sensation seeking, which means  that they prefer thrilling and adventurous carnal knowledge without using condoms to protect themselves. Lastly, those subjects who had unrestricted socio-sexual orientation, which pertains to those individuals who are  objective about the primary importance of separating sex from their emotions  had  revealed that these people do not care about who are the sexual partners of their significant other. To sum up, the context  of a person's sexual  fantasy can be closely associated with these personality traits like  extraversion, neuroticism, conscientiousness and attachment anxiety. 

Sexual fantasy content tends to somehow describe our personality type. 

IMAGE: https://www.womenshealthnetwork.com/blog/how-to-bring-your-sexual-fantasies-to-life.aspx

What about your thoughts about sexual fantasies? Do you believe that these components of human arousal could somehow discover your inner-self? 

Tuesday, December 11, 2018

Infancy and Language Development Inside a Mother's Fragile Womb

It is surprising to know that a baby's early language development begins inside a mother's fragile womb. Prior to being born, your baby has lots of nice and fruitful experiences and opportunities within a  mother's safest haven for nine months. This was the amazing conclusion of Dr. Patrick Kuhl. He says that a baby can hear audibly his or her mother's soothing voice and she can excellently comprehend a human inflection and uniquely adopts the kind of language, which is being spoken by mothers. It has been significantly discovered that a baby can readily recognize the native tongue of his mother and by another person, just a few hours after birth. The main reason why infants have a sensitive voice recognition capacity is because our voice is amplified by the body and it can be heard by them inside the utero. Babies can sense  the sounds that they hear.  Hence, the gradual development of language begins from different speech patterns and rhythms in the womb. This is her or his primary language.
A baby learns his or her primary language inside a mother's womb.

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Early language development can be taught even before you give birth.  It is triggered by fetus' sensitivity wherein any kind of stimulation could gravely affect your baby. Based on the scientific studies, the so-called EEG sensors which are innovatively designed to search for neural traces of  memory inside the utero and then the sound repetition process are tremendously integrated in your baby's memory. Moreover, replicated sounds activate a baby's memory. To explain, when an infant is exposed to a particular sound all over again the memory stimulates its recognition. Consequently, the infant's brain  waves' pattern will identify her memory of a given recognized sound.

Your baby's memory is excellently enhanced by sound repetition processes.

IMAGE:https://www.babycenter.com/2_inside-pregnancy-weeks-28-to-37_3658874.bc

Did you know that an infant's language development involves word recognition and its accompanying variations? This was the result of another cognitive related experiment by Eino Partanen, a cognitive neuroscientist. He said that an infant's neural signals allow him or her to gradually identify different sounds even those vowels which are visible when the memory traces them in your baby upon his delivery. In addition, ten weeks before his birth the baby will utilize almost all her senses to learn about her inner world. Ultrasound tests have shown that an infant will react to different sounds by kicking, moving and dancing around your delicate womb. She lifts herself up and down when she hears her mother laugh. Thus, her little fingers can suck her thumb stretch her limbs, grasp her lower extremities and have adequate coordinations to hold her umbilical cord carefully. 

Babies react to different sounds inside a womb by 
kicking, moving and dancing around a mother's womb.

IMAGE:https://www.weetnow.com/baby/heart-touching-story-two-babies-talking-in-the-womb/

Interestingly, a baby's language development inside a mother's move is also demonstrated by his or her sucking abilities to produce a vowel sound. Therefore, talk to your baby frequently, play some good music and expose your angel to different sounds of life to nurture his or her verbal and non-verbal skills to have a genius child  of which you can be proud of.


Monday, December 10, 2018

Human Personality: Reversible or Irreversible Holistic Makeup?

The dynamics of human personality defines who we are,  and how different individuals are socially interacting with the world we live in.  Theoretically, personality constitutes various concepts and naked truths in which we based the formation of our overall and composite traits. Likewise, it is strongly shaped by our shared experiences which make our distinctive persona to be in a stable state overtime. Accordingly, there are five basic personality dimensions which define our own individuality. The Big Five Basic Personality Traits are primarily composed of these attitudes or traits namely openness, conscientiousness, agreeableness, extraversion and neuroticism. These have related  clusters of related traits which are primarily responsible in moulding our affective state and behaviours alongside with the current situations. Personality traits are progressive in nature depending on the temperaments that you had developed during the delicate stages of infancy and early childhood.  As far as our temperaments are concerned, these are the innate byproducts of genetics and child rearing.

Personality formation is based on genetics, temperament and child rearing.

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Human personality involves different types of temperament and their differences, are according to the treatments of caregivers and children who have the same chronological age as their peers. Early childhood experiences act as reinforcing agents in the formation of temperaments which will be the ultimate foundation of  one's personality makeup during adulthood. Similarly, they foster the onset of dysfunctional personality patterns which could gradually become full-blown psychological disorders in later life.  However, personalities can be modified if there are new life experiences surrounding you everyday. One of its classic examples is a person who had mild or severe  emotional  traumas and other life-changing scenarios. Also, our different social roles are significant impetus for our personality changes. These will drastically modify our way of thinking, feelings and  how we behave in our environment and the people around us. The unchanged reality in life is this. Human lives change and these are in harmony with our personalities, too. Simply, our maturation  processes develop our emotional stability.

Temperaments and personality change according  to maturation processes.

IMAGE:https://www.buzzfeed.com/anjalipatel/what-is-your-temperament

The human personality and its inevitable changes depend on how comfortable we are with our self-concept perception. Consequently, the discovery and development of  diverse personality treatments are geared toward the effective ways in dealing with disturbing personality disorders and altering these  dilemmas despite  of their corresponding difficulty levels. In a recent research study by psychologists from Illinois University, it is sad to know that most of us are dissatisfied  with our personality. Thus, we are striving hard to change it in a positive manner. Conclusively, the human persona and its optimistic recognition of the different changes which had happened in your lifetime will provide the easy application of approaches in treating personality problems and to overcome your resistant to personality change syndrome. Relevant personality changes will transpire among us if we are willing to do so in time by our active  participation in different psychological interventions that will help us attain these life-changing strategies in the near future. 



Friday, December 7, 2018

Healthy Relationship Secrets among Couples: Life Goals to Forever

An ideal and lasting marital relationship is not easy to find, preserve and cherish for a lifetime. Oftentimes, marriages fall apart because of numerous irreconcilable differences that couples have, which are not being talked about due to hesitation and fears of dejection. Marriage counselors were able to devise healthy relationship secrets to heal wounded hearts and egos to gradually foster harmony, peace, love and emotional stability to be integrated within the core of their unique personality makeup which aim to restore a high-self esteem in each other. Communication is one the vital keys towards a nurturing married life. Unfortunately, the proper ways of how to do it seems to be the flaw of a melancholic husband and wife team. First and foremost, the expression of you really feels matters a lot. Say I LOVE YOU and always complement each other everyday.
Say what you feel and feel  what you say. 

IMAGE:https://answersafrica.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/09/1522666488-4476-ntic-Things-To-Say-To-A-Girl.jpg

Basically, healthy relationship secrets include your unconditional respect for your spouse. Time, heart, character and trust  must  be respected regardless of other personal factors that might interfere  between the both of you to shatter or ruin a heaven sent marriage. Do not taint it with name calling, negative talking about your loved one to friends and family. Avoid threatening your husband your wife about an imminent separation. Spend quality time with your significant other and disregard  the element of quantity to maintain the deepest love connection. Try to be apart from one another and  allow your sweetheart to do the things that he or she arduously desire. Autonomy will make your union last  forever. Create sentimental or funny love languages for each other. These are known as words of affirmations like giving gifts, quality time, acts of service and physical touch. Consistency is the vital factor here. Express your true feelings of love each day.

Physical touch is the sweetest and meaningful language among couples.

IMAGE:http://avmedia.info/blog/physical-touch-in-marriage-let-us-see-how-much-it-is-powerful/

Learn and practice the values  of appreciation. This is one of the most neglected aspect of healthy relationship secrets.  Show how much you love your wife or husband. Words of kindness, flowers and other similar romantic gestures  will seal your endless love and affection for your mate. Shift your attention to the positive traits of your spouse, Simply remember this. Nobody is perfect. Arguments are spices of your destined union. So, choose them wisely. Never fight about petty things. Keep your sexual desires for each other alive. Be creative in the sensual art of  lovemaking.

Sex spices your happy marriage.

IMAGE:https://www.marriage.com/advice/physical-intimacy/importance-of-sex-for-a-happy-married-life/

Healthy relationship secrets provide your marriage a sanctified image, based on God's ways and Divine Will. Make these reminders as your ethical standards if you want your marriage to be a role model for those people who refused to believe in the promise of FOREVER.

Thursday, December 6, 2018

Insecurity: Love's Deadliest Poison

Emotional instability among partners particularly insecurites are defined as the inadequate intactness of being secured. Your significant other is extremely dependent on the relationship to define his or her personal worth or value during a given period of time. Individual insecurities are manifested when these have to take precedence in times of crisis that needs to be addressed as soon as possible. If these poisons of life will continue, it would ruin a couple's teamwork. Some of the most common symptoms of being not secured are the following: Anxiety, paranoia, fears of loss and an increasing need to be reassured. Consequently, the said negative polarities of human behavior lower your self-esteem  However, always remember that confidence in its entirety is a relative experience. On the other hand, if the feeling goes beyond your control curb it the best way that you can.
Insecurities trigger paranoia and anxiety.

IMAGE:https://www.lovepanky.com/love-couch/better-love/relationship-insecurity-let-go

There are six main types of insecurities namely genetics, environmental stressors, fears of disappointing, conflict aversion,  dependency and broken trust. In brief, here are its descriptions. 

  • Genetics- Involves the presence of extreme reactions against threats since birth, making these people to become hypervigilant and more watchful against imminent danger. This is due to some specific hormones of the human anatomy. 
  • Environmental Stressors- People who have suffered from traumatic experiences during childhood poosses intense fight or flight reactions when threats beset them. Among these are broken promises, tragic incidents and inevitable losses in life.
  • Fear of Disappointing- Generally, this is characterized by being discounted by significant people around us. Usually, this is a feeling of not meeting human expectations. As a result, the fear of being unloved becomes evident.
  • Conflict Aversions- Insecure people are not willing to take chances, which could develop the ability and explore new opportunities. It pertains to the inability of a person to handle tensions or conflicts. Whenever he or she feels some dissonance, surrendering might be the ultimate resort to maintain personal security. 
  • Dependency-A person's behavior which is defined by the hypervigilance of one's partner and an increasing succorance on the support responses of a loved one and an irrational fear that their relationship will end.
  • Broken Trust- Partners who have been abused, abandoned or betrayed in the past. Insecure people allow past experiences to rule over their future behavior. 

Feelings of insecurity is a result of genetics.

IMAGE:https://www.momjunction.com/articles/overcome-insecurity-and-jealousy-in-a-relationship_00408113/#gref

To make insecurities resolvable, here are some of the most effective reversal strategies. These are: Mattering, agency, spiritual connection, fallback networks, acceptability of one's own marketability, not letting the past to define your future and  a better understanding of the major difference between abandonment and disappearing among others. For their  detailed explanations, visit  this link. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/rediscovering-love/201801/insecurity

Insecurities are dubbed as love's fiercest saboteurs.

To wrap up, insecurities become imperative if we are powerless and helpless. Although these are naturally germinating, your uniqueness will finally put an end to these human vulnerabilities soon.

Wednesday, December 5, 2018

The Psychological Cores of Love Addiction

Humans have different types of addiction. Food, computer games, shoes and even love. Love addiction is one kind of obsession which happens when an individual values the person that he or she loves more than his or self. Oftentimes, it causes self-neglect in terms of caring for ourselves to stay connected with the object of our affection. Prior to this, what does addiction mean and is this a key towards personal growth or a deterrent to our entire being?  Psychologically speaking, the development or progression of addictions acts as a shield from unbearable pains and it constantly creates harmful or taken for  granted feelings. Most importantly, if somebody is an addict to love it is not only about romance or sex. The uncontrollable urge to love also pertains to children, famly, guru  or even to a famed celebrity whom you have not met yet.

Love addiction is not only about love and  sex.

IMAGE: https://www.lifeworkscommunity.com/components/com_wordpress/wp/wp-
content/uploads/2011/04/love-addiction.jpg

Love addiction and its helpless victims have specific cores of fantasies like the belief that someone else can solve their problems, provision of  an  unconditional positive regard at all times and someone who will take care of them without reservations. However, if these needs are not gratified people will feel resentful and could spark a personal conflict in a relationship. These types of people have a declining self-care percentage when they are currently involved  in relationship. Love addicts manifest themselves because of abandonment histories during their younger days by primary caregivers. In like manner, they need validation by their families or from one parent alone. Consequently, irrational validations affect their self-esteem particularly in adult  life.

Love addiction is caused by a painful abandonment.

IMAGE: https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/well-good/teach-me/92094261/studies-show-love-addiction-is-real

How will you recover from the bondage of  love addiction? Self-discovery is one of the best solutions. Among the steps to undertake are the following: Breaking the denial process and admit to himself or herself that she is under the spell of being an addict to love. Also, the person needs to explore his or her childhood experiences which could have triggered this psychological dilemma. Patients who are difficult to cure from this love's deadly poison have been commonly characterized as extremely committed to relationships with two or more persons at the same time.

Love addiction occurs when a person falls in love with two or more people.

IMAGE:http://sukseshamil.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/hungungan-intim-5.png

Moreover, try to stop love addiction by observing your own behaviors. Write an inventory of your dysfunctional patterns of your current and past relationships. Be honest with your feelings and avoid blaming others. If you are not committed right now, try to be unattached for about six months. While writing a relationship inventory, look for common themes in your relationships. Next, do a self-evaluation before having a new relationship again. Assess how life would be if your self-responsibility will be utilized to a large extent. Always remember that the best kind of love is the one that will last forever. Acceptance of yourself and the one you love are your guides because these will be the keys to your personal happiness.


Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Love: The Most Effective Stress Buster

Life's stresses are inevitable. These disturbing negativities lower our self-esteem and the dynamic power to succeed in everything that we are doing and about to accomplish. There are many prescribed antidotes against stress. But, the easiest and unique way to combat stress for good is the power of love. According to Susan Johnson, a notable researcher healthy intimate relationships reduce the incidence of stress and its different types. She was able to prove this when Johnson conducted an experimental study in treating traumatic patients at the National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Medicine. What are stressors and its diverse types? Stressors are events which trigger the feelings of being stressed. Additionally. these are trivial annoyances that we are experiencing each day, A classic example is the immortal  traffic jam. Psychologically, these are aptly termed as ordinary stressors. If these undesirable situations will be a part of your existence every single day, depression and anxiety sets forth.
Love is the most powerful stress buster. 

IMAGE: https://thoughtcatalog.com/brittany-cox/2017/02/21-men-reveal-the-tiny-romantic-gestures-girls-do-that-make-them-think-girlfriend-material/20/

Traumatic types are classified as serious and extraordinary due to the ill-effects of natural disasters. These are one time events which cause Post Traumatic Syndrome. Meanwhile, if  unpleasant events  are happening  all over again a Complex Post Traumatic Syndrome enters your system  like a thief in the night. Similarly, child traumas fall under the attribution of codependency, coined by Pia Melody and the other advocates of codependency movement.  Whatever your stressors are, love and your type of intimate relationship has a major impact on your emotional and physiological well-being. For example, a happy marriage leads to a  better physical and mental health. On the contrary, unhappy marital union gives rise to depression and anxiety.

Power of love is the most potent cure to depression and anxiety.

IMAGE: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/35-cute-love-quotes-for-him-from-the-heart_b_8471080

Love promotes longevity among married couples because of the emotional support  freely given to one another. Traumatic stressors have been miraculously cured by a loving heart with this very effective contextual truth according to Johnson.

Most of all, we know that your resilience to trauma and your ability to cope with trauma are linked to the quality of your most intimate relationships.” 

Love conquers all things.

IMAGE: https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/is-feminism-killing-romance-a7451416.html

Johnson and her couple therapy approach is specially designed for those who have been victims of PTSD. Among them are police authorities, firemen and veterinarians. For couples, she had brilliantly devised some natural techniques to heal relationships and she said that the best healing ever discovered is 

The natural place to heal from trauma is the arms of someone you love”.

Lover's arms provides a secure attachment. 

IMAGE: https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/platonic-love-romantic-love/1816206

Love and a secure attachment to a special person in your life hinder the development of PTSD in the long run. Victims of this psychological problem particularly children should have a loving relationship when they grow up to be completely healed from their horrible experiences in the past. Going back, couples should help one another by having a non-codependent partner who will nurture the relationship through couple therapy. To sum up, married couples must be  able to relate with one another perfectly to attain their desired objectives in improving their own unique individuality. Consequently, couple therapy will be able to restore  broken and wounded unions after several sessions. 










Thursday, November 29, 2018

Simple Ways of How to Hurdle Fears of Inevitable Failures

You are not human, if failures do not haunt your happy life. When anyone fell short of high expectations, he or she becomes very depressed and uneasy about the whole thing. On the other hand. some people are trying to escape from the situation by consciously avoiding it the best way that they can. What about you? Do you feel helpless when fears of  inevitable failures are destroying your self-conviction to drastically find your way out inside a dark tunnel filled with anxieties? If you said yes to all my hypothetical questions; then it is time to change your inner perspectives to keep you going and be successful in your own right.

Conquer your fear of irrational failures to succeed.

IMAGE:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4reKWuJ8jvE

Fears of inevitable failures are our conscious behaviors to fall short of expectations in consonance with varying performance standards at work, in school, interpersonal dealings and so much more. Logically, exceeding a required standard entails a positive outcome and vice versa. A person's failure leads to secondary procrastination. To explain we opt to delay something vital where we presume that we are bound to be unsuccessful. However, these silly fears can be eradicated by perceiving our negative feelings as rooms for self-improvement to discover lots of things and possibilities in the long run. Analyze critically about what is  happening to you right now. This easy technique known as thought experimenting, paves the way for you on what to emphasize in your life and leave those negative scenarios behind.

Thought experimenting allows you to discover the different scenarios to avoid.

IMAGE:https://www.suara.com/health/2018/09/05/200000/percaya-tidak-ini-lima-zodiak-yang-mengidap-atelophobia-akut

Below, are the viable ways to strategically solve your fears of invincible failures step by step.

  1. Presume that you are a scientist. Test all possible ideas to find out the best solution to your challenging problems. To explain, trials are acid tests before you can have a clearer picture of  your chosen solution.
  2. Start asking yourself a very catchy question. "What were those past actions that I had taken to resolve delicate and critical issues like fears of invincible failures?"
  3. Always remember this. Develop the habit of learning, that there are variations and unexpected fluctuations in your day-to-day tasks to avoid disappointments.
  4. Accept the fact that failures are self-improvement road maps. These are useful tactics to motivate other people and yourself, to be optimistic about today and the future.
Accept failures to improve your unique self.

IMAGE:https://www.forbes.com/sites/glassheel/2013/04/23/5-ways-to-conquer-your-fear-of-failure/#42e91b1a43cc

Fears of invincible failures are magnificent platforms toward the advancement of personal interests where anxieties and thwarted goals or aspirations are not big deals at all to have a fruitful life.






Wednesday, November 28, 2018

Life's Gut- Busting Lessons to Ponder and Live By with a Smile

Fruitful and life's gut-busting lessons could dynamically transform yourself into an amazing person with a grateful heart. Shape your heart and mind by being open to the challenging invitations as they come. In  other words, do not be afraid to be spontaneous about everything. Spontaneity is the best antidote against your senseless fears and nonsense habits. It opens new doors to both creativity and the inner happiness you earnestly deserve. This is your undaunted and positive response to any undertaking to help you develop and use your unique experiential gain. In addition, goals are successfully completed through exploration and experimentation. Thus, our varied experiences whether good or bad must be enjoyed to the fullest. Always nurture the value of being spontaneous because its a larger than life form of realization.-To expect good things each day like a big surprise.

Spontaneity is to accept every opportunity without any fear.

IMAGE:https://www.inc.com/molly-reynolds/9-companies-that-nailed-the-whole-surprise-and-del.html

Never hold back drastic changes in life which  encompass full commitment. This is just a matter of self-correcting our wayward attitudes and behaviors.  However, we might fell short on our  attempts about behavior modifications. To begin the strategic applications of  life's gut busting lessons, face, conquer and  let go of your fears with a strong conviction. Next, each one of  us should learn and appreciate the values of compulsion in its very practical context. Do not cease to discover anything in this world to foster the deepest satisfaction in life. Do not be upset  to learn new and wonderful things. Compulsion resonates both creation and discovery to make our life exciting and worth living.

Compulsion is the steering wheel of creation and discovery.

IMAGE:http://alltimeshortstories.com/short-stories-about-life/

None of us are exceptions to adversities. The insightful life's gut busting lessons teach us how to accept adversities and then make peace with them to live and be happy for a lifetime. Be realistic in solving all your issues, by accepting this bittersweet truth that it is too impossible for us to control things sometimes. Accept these inevitables of our existence to free us from stresses and depression. Liberate ourselves from negativities to change our focus of attention. Practice self-compassion every single moment of our journey. Speak kindly to ourselves from the time we woke up. This will be an enriching avenue to perceive positive outcomes in life today and in the not so distant future.

Self-compassion is speaking kindly to yourself.

IMAGE: https://www.sebascelis.com/el-poder-de-la-autoestima/

One helpful hint to my unguarded temperament is to do away with unnecessary overreactions and diligently practice with its opposite- UNDERREACTING. Analyze those bad and  happy moments and its consequences. Then, think of them as blessings in disguise. Above all these, you must remember that troubles will come and go. However, these baggages do not leave us for good. Problems are mental exercises which make us stronger, faithful to God and  in our self-commitment to succeed in any area of our temporary journey here on earth. Finally,one of  life's gut busting lessons that will make us happy each day is to STOP WORRYING. We all know, that it is not easy to do. But, have you ever realized that it is a DEADLY POISON FOR A BRIGHT FUTURE? Worries about the next ten years of life is time wasting. Live for today and your future will be more abundant, peaceful and worth living.




Monday, November 26, 2018

The Psychological Rudiments of Perfectionism

Some people have perceived perfectionism as a positive character trait. It is one of the  secret formulas of success. But, it has become as a self-defeating belief which makes it more difficult to attain what we really desire. Exploring this detrimental attitude is the subject matter of our worth-reading blog today. This is often justified by many as a healthy behavior. According to Brenel Brown, a writer and researcher he said.

"Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfection is not about healthy achievement and growth."


 Perfectionism is justified as a healthy behavior.

IMAGE: http://cdn8.steveseay.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Perfectionism.jpg

Perfectionism might be one of your attributes of which you are not aware of. What are its tell tale signs? 
  • Unable to accomplish a task unless it can be done without flaws.
  • Focuses less on a learning process, the results are more important than an applied methodology.
  • An undertaking is not yet done until it is indeed perfect to the letter.
  • Tendency to procrastinate at times, to ensure a perfect byproduct. 
  • Needs more time to finish a project than others.

A perfectionist wants a task to be very detailed to the letter.

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There are two types of perfectionism. The healthy and unhealthy one. To differentiate, a healthy perfectionist is a person with a strong motivational force behind an achievement. It features an innate need of successful people  particularly athletes, celebrities and the likes. On the other hand, its opposite is self-destructive in nature. It is a conflicting attitude between productivity and being obsessive. Do you consciously do these things without reservations? Read on and ponder? Well, if you do, you tend to be a perfectionist.

  1. Spending almost 30 minutes in writing a two-sentence email.
  2. Two mistakes in a given exam is a sign of failure.
  3. Unhappiness sets in, when others become successful.
  4. Unrealistic comparison with others' achievements. 
  5. Avoidance in playing a game with peers; instead, tries a new activity to show that he or she is perfect.
Deadlines have to be met by a perfectionist all the time.

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What are the specific domains of perfectionism? Perfectionists are commonly found in a workplace. school, intimate relationships, hygiene and health, speaking or writing as well as one's physical appearance. Anyone who considers himself as flawless or prolific, has been influenced by these factors:

  1. Frequent fear of disappointment from others.
  2. Mental health issues like the presence of an obsessive compulsive disorder.
  3. Parents who are manifesting a perfectionist behavior.
  4. Troubled attachment with parents.
  5. Insecurities.

Perfectionism is triggered by disappointments and insecurities. 

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Although this not normal according to psychologists, hone perfectionism based on its healthy benefits. First, do not get stressed about potential mistakes.  Everybody commits mistakes, right? However, learn how to evaluate the gravity of your errors according to a given task and then study the outcome that you desire to get rid of stress. Always see to it that everything is balanced. Quality and efficiency should work harmoniously to produce a desired output.

Perfection should not get in the way of your work efficiency.

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Focus on your effort and forget about perfectionism. Refrain from perfecting tasks by going beyond your capacities and limitations. Develop a creative idea or provide some perspective analysis to attain uniqueness in whatever you do. Do not feel ashamed to commit more mistakes because these are nice avenues for self-improvement. Remember this. Being too perfect does not lead to better things all the time. God is the only one who is perfect and we can never ever change this absolute reality.



Friday, November 23, 2018

The How to Facts of Child Discipline

Child rearing is one of the most challenging journeys of a fruitful parenthood. Parents have different ways of child discipline based on the perceptions of effectiveness and cultural roots. But, the core of its fair and holistic imposition is to teach their children about what is right or wrong in terms of objective judgement and untainted morality. It is an action or inaction which aims to regulate behaviors to attain certain accords or agreements with a particular system of governance. These are sets of expectation which are the requisites by any entity including self-groups, classes, fields, industries or societies. Its enriching history had emanated from the Victorian Era. From then on, the widespread use of a disciplinarian governance in children was strictly implemented during the ancient times.

Victorian Era discipline.

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Traditional children discipline involves diverse techniques like time, responsibility and physical punishment.  To briefly describe, a time form or technique of discipline makes use of time as a regulator and governor in its strictest sense. The main objective of this type of regulation is how to use time efficiently. Each activity is governed with a time boundary. Wise time management is applied to promote skills organization and behavior modifications to ensure alliance with time-related deadlines. This has no consequence on the overall personality of children.

Time discipline uses time as boundaries.

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A responsibility-based discipline is common among organizations, to gain a better understanding about the possible solutions to company problems. Meanwhile, the physical punishment mode of discipline is focused on inflicting physical pains through spanking, slapping and hitting with an object to instill the dire consequences of a wrongdoing. Child discipline is a moral obligation to have a well- behaved being as he or she grows old. To follow these basic rules, role models are essential. During a child's formative years, these rules have to seriously imposed. Over the years, your children will be more productive during adulthood. However, the kind of discipline solely depends on the parents of a kid. Below, are different parent types and the kinds of discipline that they impose at home.

Scolding to discipline is seldom used by modern-day parents 
to avoid upsetting their child.

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  1. Permissive child discipline- A parenting style with low demands and high responsiveness. Parents are loving who impose few house rules or guidelines on their children. A matured behavior is not a basic requirement. In other words, their parents act as best friends.
  2. Authoritarian child discipline- High demands from parents but with a low responsiveness rate. Also, the presence of high expectations from their children becomes inevitable. Similarly, feedback and nurturance are less felt. Mistakes are realized through harsh punishments.
  3. Positive or negative reinforcement child discipline- Comprised of a good or negative punishment to understand the vicious cycles of breaking human rules.
  4. Positive reinforcement- Appropriate use of rewards for good behaviors. These are in the forms of giving them treats, praises and by pointing out their progress in any undertaking.
  5. Grounding child discipline-No special privileges are allowed like video games or use of mobile phones. Experts say that this is not an effective form of punishment.
  6. Natural punishment child discipline- A self-realization method wherein children are free to explore the effects of their negative behaviors. 
  7. Corporal child discipline- Characterized as good sometimes. But, its extremes are abusive in form and mind.
Corporal punishment in children is still a sensational debate 
among psychologists and modern parents.

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Child discipline perfectly moulds your kids into morally upright citizens, who are constantly guided by a sense of compassion, balance and enlightenment through role modeling. Parents should not do away with the traditional  approaches of child rearing because these are the primal rudiments of a well-balanced personality, which is governed by functional moral values then and now.




Shopping Addiction: The Psychological Insights

Rings of various types and designs gratify my aesthetic fancies whenever I see them on online shopping websites. These elegant accessories provide me with inexpressible bliss whenever I wore them during my younger years. Unfortunately, some of these had gone to oblivion for special reasons. Up to now, it is an irresistible fetish which I have to figure out if shopping addiction has caught me unaware wayback from my adolescence. Based on recent studies by the American Psychiatric Association, DSM-5 or the Diagnostic Statistical Manual for Mental Health Disorders 5, being a shopaholic is not medically characterized as a mental disorder. Compulsive buying such as shopping is best described as an intense preoccupation in purchasing, measured by its frequency and the uncontrollable urge to shop. Although i can still control it. my burning passion to acquire  splendid rings never left my creative mind. Here are the signs and symptoms which could have had  haunted me at times to become an iconic queen of fashion.

Jewelry addiction is a form of compulsive buying.

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The prominent signs and symptoms of shopping addiction are:

  • Spending more time in thinking about what to buy.
  • Anxious prior to  purchases.
  • Feeling of relief or euphoria after buying the items.
  • Guilt or shame after feels 

Jewelries provide comfort and ultimate satisfaction in my life.

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Researchers say that almost 90% of women are affected with shopping addiction than men. Societal norms and gender factors  have significant roles in the demographics of different behavioral problems. Also, the age factor is a culprit of an addiction's early manifestation  particularly during teenage years.  Generally, a behavioral problem like collecting jewelries refers to an overall state of being which affects your health and wellness to some extent. These are brought about by conscious decisions which could not control the urge despite its detrimental effects. How do you become a shopping addict? Read the subsequent sections.

Compulsive buying is a conscious decision to desire something to gratify your wants.

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Shopping is an enjoyable activity which is functional for our economy and it is sometimes a reinforced behavior due to the presence of rewards. It emanates from our brain's reward center which includes the process of item browsing and final purchasing steps. Shopping addiction experts say that you might be prone to this behavioral issue if you belong to a family with mental illnesses and substance abuse addiction. 

Shopping addiction occurs when a person is suffering from anxiety and depression. 

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Also, people who are depressed could fall into the prey of compulsive shopping. Likewise, the  tag compulsive shopper usually belongs to a young woman with low educational attainment. Some shoppers who belong under this classification are commonly depressed, anxious and self-conscious.  Shopping addiction is their way of dealing with negative emotions. People self-medicate themselves by shopping, to temporarily forget about their psychological problems. The common signs and  symptoms of being a mall addict  are as follows:
  • Anticipation- This is the urge to  shop and it runs in your mind without end.
  • Preparation- Involves the plan of using credit cards, what to wear and buy together with the location of your spending spree.
  • Shopping- An intense feeling of excitement sets in while going around a mall.
  • Spending- Final phase of your act to purchase what you want, mixed feelings between euphoria and disappointment after the whole process has been finally accomplished.
Shopping addicts have a euphoric feeling while doing this compensatory activity.

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Shopping addiction does not integrate itself with individual wealth. If you are unable to curtail it, financial and marital issues might arise. To address this strain in your lifestyle, cognitive behavioral therapy is deemed necessary. This is a group or single mode of treatment which deals with identification of problematic thought patterns. In this scientific approach, a therapist teaches a client how to question destructive thoughts or ideas and their effects on a client's behaviors and emotions. After which the strategic applications of self-defeating techniques are being done. The core of CBT is to cope up with depression in a non-stressful manner. Debtors Anonymous, a famous support group has a 12-step program on how to stop unnecessary spending gradually. 

Shopping addiction can be treated by cognitive behavioral therapy.

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The lure and curse of shopping addiction have not yet engulfed my gracious nature. I have  patiently trained and motivated myself to live within my means despite of being an Imelda Marcos alter ego in many splendid ways.